Pain
Are you in pain?
This is not only another question I get asked a lot but this is one I ask people coming into class as well.
As a stroke survivor this is a very hard question to answer and when I ask other stroke survivors I often here the same thing:
“its hard to explain but yes”
“there is an always present nerve pain or slight nerve sensitivity you just kinda get used to.”
“there is also specific areas that scream out on certain days”
“there are headaches out of the blue”
“brain fog” “head pressure””eye pressure””jaw pain””tailbone pain” “joint pain””foot pain”
It’s too long a list to recite to a stranger simply asking to be nice.
How long do you have is seriously the best answer I can give.
I often laugh to myself because its is really fucking hard to explain,
Hell, my shoulders play ping pong with each other all day long, causing neck and upper back pain, my hip is tight, causing my affected foot toes curl at random moments tightening so hard it becomes uncomfortable. My head randomly hurts. The tightness in my hand becomes bothersome, nails scratching my palm
you see it’s not only the stroke affected side that hurts, tingles and feels numb, yet somehow manages to be overly sensitive, no.
It’s also the dominant side often that is in more pain because it bears the weight of the whole other side as well.
What are you supposed to do too manage pain?
The less you move the more intense the pain becomes. So although movement may feel like intuitively the last thing you want to do to manage the pain, it is the thing you need most.
Movement truly is medicine. Breath is Medicine.
What I have realized teaching more and more stroke survivors everyday, yoga or pain management techniques are actually often somewhat counterintuitive.
Meaning: in order to get more you have to do less, in order to relax deeper you don’t go as far, in order to rise up you press down. Opposites. Going against common sense somewhat.
Counter intuition is a valuable thing to use that requires a bit of thought.Pushing beyond the “status quo”.
In a world where we want fast, quick and to feel no pain at all.
Counter intuition challenges you to break a pattern. Go against what might initially feel right. It challenges you.
Sometimes yoga is beyond reason. and you just need throw caution to the wind and see.
“Pain is inevitable. Suffering optional.”
This quote is known as being a part of buddhist teachings, although their exact person to credit for this quote is unknown.
Who said it, the Buddha, the Dalai Lama, or Haruki Murakami? Does it matter?
It is a teaching I think we all can relate to.
If life=trauma and
trauma causes pain, can we not say then
life =pain?
Which would mean its unavoidable.
After researching my spiritual texts to write this piece I found it interesting not many reference “pain”. Instead of the word pain in spiritual texts words like sorrow or suffering are in its place. Eluding to the fact pain in inherent to life and the emotion behind the pain is to the degree of suffering you will create.
how much suffering will you create for yourself?
I have learned to think having no pain at all is not realistic, even in a non stroke survivor body.
Pain is a part of life. And feeling pain an even better part of stroke recovery. To feel something at all is a win.
Back to “managing pain” as they say. how do we manage our physical pain so that we can function day to day?
Well, I view yoga is a tool that helps assess the pain, rather than numb it or push it away. Sit with it. Send your attention into it, not away from it. Ask it what it wants to show you. Bring your full awareness to it.
Caroline Myss The Anatomy of the Spirit p. 38
“Life is painful at times, and spiritually, we are meant to face the pain that life presents.
In the Western world, however, we often misrepresent God’s plan for us and expect life to be comfortable and free from trouble.
We measure God’s presence in our lives by our level of personal comfort; we believe God is here if our prayers are answered.
But neither God nor Buddha, nor any other spiritual leader or tradition, guarantees or encourages a pain-free life.”
I don’t practice Asana everyday, but I come into a practice a few times a week where I check in on my body, I move and breathe. I lay and ask my body what it feels, I ask my body to guide me to healing, doing still breathing practices like weighted yoga Nidra. Headache, eye mask and head support, shoulder opener, hand weight, pelvis weight. My most painful areas…find the point of stillness in alignment and breathe.
My yoga practice does not really ever look the same because our bodies change so rapidly each day brings a new feat. A new territory to attend to so to speak. Resting and relaxing the pain away.